Keeping your emotions in check is one of the hardest things you can ever do. The desire to get even with people who have hurt you seems to push your heart to act in a particular way. However, many people end up feeling guilty for paying back evil for evil. This is because they don’t like causing harm to others. Ambrose Bierce put it well, ‘speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.’
In order not to react to everything that comes your way, take time before giving your answer. You can count to ten or even take a glass of water as you ponder on what has happened. If you need more time, do not hesitate to take it. It is better to be quiet rather than to spew hatred when you open your mouth. Another thing you could do is go for a walk. It will help clear your mind and you will find that you see things differently.
Keeping busy while processing your thoughts help expend the energy you would otherwise use to fight. Always remember you don’t have to attend all the fights you are invited to. If someone cuts you off on the road, you don’t have to return the favor. It is a choice you make to engage with people. You can choose the positive engagements you want and ignore the negative ones.