Waiting for someone to apologize before you forgive them can be so draining. What if they don’t realize their mistake and ask for forgiveness? Will you still keep hurting whilst waiting for them? Many times you may have taken offence at what someone said or did, but the person does not know that they hurt you. So while you are stuck in the hurt and engrossed in the mistake, they are unaware that they hurt you. Therefore the apology may not be forthcoming.

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On the other hand, you may find someone who is too proud to ask for forgiveness yet they know that they have offended you. The person may want you to forget the incidence without them having to ask for your forgiveness. Will you still be friends with them or will you keep demanding that they first apologize? In this situation, you are the one who is hurting the most.

Forgiving someone is a matter of choice. The person may not be forthcoming with an apology but because you want to release the bile you have in your heart, you choose to let go of the hurt in your heart. You are basically freeing yourself from the trap that unforgiveness puts you in. This does not mean that you have to be friends again with this person. When trust is broken, it takes time to rebuild. Thus you don’t have to remain close to someone who hurt you. Live your life far from them. Forgiveness frees you to enter other relationships on the right footing.

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